I hate coffee

Okay that’s a lie I am trying to tell myself. I love coffee and I miss coffee, so very much.

A couple of months ago my boss, Anxious Yogi, brought in a keurig for us to use upstairs (yes even though we only have 8 staff members we have two floors…it’s complicated). See, Anxious Yogi is kind of a coffee snob and her GF had an extra one so she gave it to us…hurray! The problem is that it is right outside my office, and it smells delicious.

I bought some decaf cups when she first brought it in, but they are gone. All I have is my lukewarm cup of chai tea and a cup of water. Sad face. Everyday at around 10:30 Anxious Yogi makes coffee and I cry inside. I really couldn’t ask for a better boss though. When I first came out as a non-coffee drinker she teased me relentlessly, tried to make me sniff coffee grounds, and attempted to convince me that just one cup wouldn’t hurt. The next day she told me she felt bad for teasing me and making me cry (this would never happen) and that she was going to quit coffee with me for two weeks. She even let a latte her GF brought her sit on her desk all day…not even a sip. Such a champ. So far my excuse of “coffee gives me ¬†migraines” has worked. She even brought me a decaf coffee when she brought doughnuts for the crew last week, isn’t that tender?

Bosses day is tomorrow I had a great idea for her a while ago, but didn’t know when bosses day was. I can’t remember what it was now. I hope it comes back to me before tomorrow is over.

I know that I can drink coffee while trying to get knocked up, but I decided it wasn’t worth it. At $800 a pop, I want my body to be as ready to make and catch a zygote as possible. I fully plan on drinking coffee once our little fetus is implanted and growing. There is no way I could make it that long. All I want for Christmas is a latte, and a baby too.

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2 thoughts on “I hate coffee

  1. Molly says:

    I admire your strength. I cut my caffeine to 1 cup a day, and even that has been trying.

  2. DeCaf says:

    Caffeine withdrawal is the worst! I went from 5+ cups of black tea a day to 0 cold turkey after three migraines in one week. I had no idea how grumpy I was during that process until it was pointed out to me, lol. Now I’m just 1-2 cups on days when I don’t get enough sleep.

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